Posts Tagged With: quotes

Moderation is for Cowards


Moderation is for Cowards

I recently heard a quote that missed my head and hit me right in the soul that it’s taken me a few days to digest it.  It said, “Anything in life worth doing, is worth overdoing, moderation is for cowards.” I don’t know the author of this quote or even where I heard it, but it reminds me of another quote by Hunter S. Thompson, “Anything worth doing is worth doing well.” David Goggins recently inspired me with, “Choose to be uncommon amongst uncommon people.” But, I suppose my favorite comes from Philippians 4:8 – “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think on these things.”

There’s something to be said about giving our all, our best effort and our energy into what we want to achieve in this life.  I have a spirit of excellence. I don’t know how to do anything half-assed. It’s not in my psychological makeup. Call me an A-type personality, OCD, or an over-thinker, none of those names matter – because what I feel it comes down to, in the base, in the foundation, in the root  of my very being …is that I’m not a coward.

I am afraid of a lot of things. I’m afraid of fear. I’m afraid of failure. I’m afraid of disappointment.  I’m afraid of judgement.  I’m afraid of not being enough, not good enough, or being too much. But Fear doesn’t rule me. Fear doesn’t control me. Fear sure as hell doesn’t stop me.  I believe everyone is afraid of rejection, judgement, and failure in emotional, psychological and physical aspects.  But, excellence and facing those life obstacles, standing up to fear …is what separates us, and moderation is for cowards.

Cowards lie to themselves and everyone else around them. They pretend life is some fucking fairy-tale as they smoke their peace pipes and stick their heads in the sands of modern philosophy. They’re excuse makers and moderate pussies. Albert Einstein once said, “The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.”

I believe hate is bad, and the way our world hates each other breaks my heart. But, hate is better than indifference. Indifference is the cruelest emotion.  Indifferences doesn’t care. Hate is at least filled with passion.  Those who are indifferent and don’t care – cause the most damage in the world.  Those who don’t feel it necessary, or are afraid to feel emotion, love, or passion, those who don’t give their best or approach everything in life with everything they have, who wants to do everything in moderation – are cowards, nothing more than a yellow-bellied sap-sucking woodpecker banging their beaks against the grain, causing a ruckus but changing nothing. A complete nuisance and waste of space.

I don’t have time or patience or respect for moderation cowards.  I don’t care what you do, but whatever it is – do it with excellence, overdo it, do it well, be uncommon and make it happen – or else get the fuck out of the way for the real heroes. Take a chance.  Make the jump. Fight the good fight.  Kiss the girl. Leave the hiding to the cowards, let them fight over the breadcrumbs life has to offer.  Not me – I am a warrior and I seek to surround myself with warriors who can’t accept moderation.

Till next time,

~T.L. Gray

Categories: author T.L. Gray, Blog Post, Dream, Dreams, Fairy Tale, Faith, family, February, Health & Fitness, Hope, Hurt, Independence, Inspirational, Instructional, Life, love, Musings, Philosophy, Quotes, relationship, Relationships, Spiritual, T.L. Gray, Writing | Tags: , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Company You Keep

The Company You Keep

They say, “You are the company you keep.” Who are they?  This time, it’s many of the people I’ve grown to respect and admire over the years, people who have gone before me such as Epictatus, Benjamin Franklin, Cohen, Albert Einstein, Voltaire, etc.  Japanese Proverb says, “When a character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends.” English proverb says, “A man is known by the company he keeps.” Drew Houston says, “You become the average of the five people you hang out with.” In 1 Corinthians 15, “Don’t be misled. Bad company corrupts good character.”  Starting to get the point? And before I move on – for those who think keeping their own company solves the bad company issue – you can be the bad influence in your own life.  “Character is much easier kept than recovered,” Thomas Payne.

I say that, to say this …be careful of the company you keep.  If your life is falling apart and you keep suffering, you keep failing, you keep facing the same problems over and over and over, look around at your support system. If you don’t have a support system – then that too is your fault and responsibility.  You can’t blame the world for leading your astray or letting you down – because the world hasn’t been around. YOU led yourself astray and YOU let yourself down.  But, if you do have a support system – check yourself and check them.  Are they a strong, positive, inspirational, encouraging, moralistic, supportive, natural leaders, got their shit together, and successful examples? If not, then there might be the problem. The BIGGER question – are you all those things to your friends AND to yourself?  There’s another answer to your failures and problems.

We delude ourselves. I’ve done it. I’m guilty.  Thomas Payne is right, “To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead.”  We quickly and easily want to lay blame to others for our failures.  It’s his fault, it’s her fault, it’s their fault, I didn’t have the same opportunities, life isn’t fair, if I didn’t have kids, if I had only got an education, if I had the money, and so on and so on. I’ve heard the excuses. I’ve tried to use them, but when it comes down to it – I can only blame myself for making poor choices, either in ignorance or vanity.

One thing I have learned through it all – I noticed a pattern, am noticing the pattern again, and must conclude – the times of my greatest successes coincided with the times I surrounded myself with people that lent me strength to achieve those successes, who encouraged me, and who inspired me. No one ever did anything FOR me, I’ve fought hard for everything I’ve ever achieved through sacrifice and hard work. The times of my greatest failures and disappointments were when I surrounded myself with vampires, by selfish, lazy people, by bad company who took my love, my charity, my compassion, and my gifts for granted – and left me empty and dry. Shame on me.

We think the company we keep doesn’t really affect us, our life, our successes or our failures, but that’s just a lie we tell ourselves because we don’t want to face the truth: the company we keep reflects WHO WE ARE, where we are in life, and what we value. You can lie to yourself all you want, but if you want to know who you really are, not who you think you are, look at the people around you – look at the company you keep.

I am uncommon amongst uncommon people. I am beautiful. I am strong. I am filled with passion, integrity and good character.  I am driven. I am determined. I love myself and I’m working hard to cut out the leeches, the vampires, the excuses, the corrupt, the liars, and the thieves  – and surround myself with people who inspire me, who love me, who value me, who encourage me, who love and value themselves – because I am not done yet. I have achieved a lot in this world, but I have more work to do.  I’m not looking for perfect people – no such thing exists. I’m looking for uncommon people amongst uncommon people – the dreamers, the fighters, the people who don’t take no for answers, the people who never give up, and the people who don’t let excuses stop them. That will be the company I will be to others and the company I keep. Because of that – watch what I do, it’s gonna be fucking amazing!


Till next time,

~T.L. Gray

Categories: author T.L. Gray, Blog Post, blogging, Dream, Dreams, Faith, family, friends, Health & Fitness, Hope, Hurt, Independence, Inspirational, Instructional, Musings, Philosophy, poem, Poetry, Quotes, relationship, Relationships, respect, Spiritual, T.L. Gray, Writing | Tags: , , , , , | Leave a comment

Understanding Humanity

Understanding Humanity

One of the biggest themes in my current WIP is an archangel experiencing and learning about the complexities of humanity.  I’m really curious what he discovers in the end (I haven’t written the ending yet), because the thing that confuses me most is humanity, or more specific  – human emotion and the way we sometimes treat one another. I’m a human, I should understand it, but I don’t.  People confuse the hell out of me.  They’re unpredictable, and quite frankly, disappoint me often.

One of my good friends really loves to ‘tell me like it is’ and sometimes makes a comment that I’m too hard on people and hold them to too high a standard; that I make people feel like they can never please me because I expect too much.  What am I supposed to do with that?  Apologize that I expect people to be decent, to act with goodness and kindness, to make reasonable decisions, to expect them to do and try their best?  Perhaps he’s right.  Perhaps I do hold people to a higher standard, but not something that I don’t hold myself to first.

Some people are just assholes – self-centered egotists, who can’t get their head’s out of their asses long enough to think about other people.  They’re often miserable in their quest for success or domination, but it only makes them end up alone or surrounded with people just as shallow as they are – now, that I find very sad.  Most of the time they don’t understand why they feel empty or like shit, because they’re not thinking about what they’re pouring into themselves or into the lives of the people that come into their circle.  What  you eat, what you read, what you watch, what you participate in, what your habits are – that’s what makes you who you are, determines how you feel, and creates the atmosphere in which you live.  If you only consider yourself and what YOU want – you’re not sharing yourself with the people around you, therefore you won’t enjoy the fruits of their true friendship.  You get the semblance of a friendship.  But a true friendship is an invaluable treasure.  All those fake friends don’t mean shit and will scatter like the wind if  you actually ever needed any of them.

I love my friends and I have some of the best friends in the world because they genuinely care about me.  They love me, and I love them more than I could ever express to them.  They share their fears, hopes, complaints, and aspirations with me, and provide an ear and support for me to share mine.  That’s what friendship is – and exchange of who we are as human beings.  It can’t be all give or take – or else it’s not a real friendship.

I’d rather have one true friend than a thousand acquaintances.  I do truly believe in the golden rule – that we should treat others as we want to be treated.  But think about that – would you want to be treated the way you treat others?  Would you want to be treated with disrespect, indifference, arrogance, selfishness, contempt, prejudice, etc.  Would you want to be played, lied to, cheated on, hurt, abused, or used?  Would you want to be ignored, bullied, or just thrown away?

Be careful how you treat others.  Try to understand humanity.  Karma is a bitch. You want friends, be a friend.  You want love, love.  You want happiness, spread happiness.  You want life – live.  And for those cancers that come into your life and try to drag you down with their negativity, prejudice, arrogance, and selfishness – give them an opportunity to change, but if they don’t, cut them out like a cancerous tumor lest they kill you both.

I’m a very rich woman because I have a few true great friends.

Till next time,

~A Grateful Friend

Categories: Blog Post, Inspirational, Musing, Philosophy, Quotes, Writing | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Just Walk Beside Me and Be My Friend – Albert Camus

Don't Walk

I wish I did the right thing every day.  I wish I always said the right words, had the right responses, made the right comments, remembered the right quotes, and knew the right steps.  I seem to be more familiar with the wrong ones and sometimes that makes navigating through this life really hard.  Sometimes it’s so hard I want to give up and just cease to exist anymore.  I know I’m not alone in these sentiments. There are just as many right moments as there are wrong, and I feel the joy of it as much as I feel the pain – we all do. Some of us are just more vocal about it than others.

The one thing I can’t imagine though is not having my best friends with me through this journey.  I can’t help but think of the quote by Albert Camus that says, “Don’t walk in front of me; I may not follow.  Don’t walk behind me; I may not lead.  Just walk beside me and be my friend.”

While there are times I lead and other times I follow, but it’s walking together that counts.  We enter this world alone.  We will leave it alone.  But, we’re not made to be alone.  Even the most reclusive among us need  human interaction at times.  As with this Camus quote, I can see where friendships and relationships have failed in the past because I’ve done just that… led until no longer followed, and followed until I became lost.  It wasn’t fair to my partners, and it wasn’t fair to me, and the consequence of the imbalance was the failure and dissolution of those relationships. I can’t fix them, only learn from them.

In this new phase of my life, I’m experiencing new relationships and friendships where my partners are wise enough and love me enough not to allow me to do either.  When I try to follow, they stop and let me catch up.  When I try to lead, they stop until I turn around to stand beside them.  They love me as I am and don’t try to change me, yet inspire me to discover myself.  They hold my hand when I’m scared to let me know everything will be okay and they’re not going anywhere.  They refuse to let go when in fear I try to run.  They meet me eye to eye and tell me the truth, not to hurt me but so I can walk in truth. They tilt my eyes toward the stars and teach me to dream. They share their frustrations, hopes, dreams, fears and faults, because I am also their friend and they walk beside me.

I tell them often how much I love them.  They also tell me the same.  They are truly the greatest treasures in this world, so precious, so rare, and I’m so blessed to know them. I’m so honored they have chosen me to be their friend. They are closer to me than any lover and more loving than any family member I’ve ever had.  I still worry and fret about the things I cannot change or the fears that still sit in front of me, but I face them all with confidence because I know I’m not alone.

Till next time,

~T.L. Gray

Categories: Blog Post, Inspirational, Musing, Quotes, Spiritual, Writing | Tags: , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Today by T.L. Gray


Poem by T.L. Gray

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